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Posted by Ivan

Happiness is not determined by wealth. People all over work for wealth and happiness and the tendency is to think of happiness with wealth. I am by no means the exception.

From small and coming from an extremely poor family, I have gone through extreme hardship. From the little boy that has gone trhough the hard truth about life during the early years, it has moulded me to be strong and especially so in the face of adversity. Despite that, today, I have come to terms that I have been very lucky, and never to blame the past, except for the occasional lament made and spoken in jest and joke.

Lucky to be born to this world firstly as a human being. Depending on your faith, one learns that one can be destined to the very lowly level creature such as animal and to suffer for a long time.

Lucky to be born as complete and normal person, unlike many who are handicapped in some way or another.

Lucky to have children and family, and be where I am today, very much better position than many others. Think about this, to be what you are, where you are, and how well you are nowadays. So much so, we now take life for granted. For some, let’s hope we still hold on to the good values that our parents nurtured in us and that we have not given up as yet. Striving and owrking very hard each day to make our life better, the people we love better.

For many, I am sure they still give some thoughts to the lives of others, others who are not so fortnate like us, but have to suffer and endure many hardships. So at times, we do what our compassions tells us to. We do what we can for the society, contribute donations, help out others, hoping that the little we do will touch on the lives of others. Our own little way of greatness and creating history for ourselves.

When I received and watched this video, the tears came naturally when I saw the laughter in these people. Deep in my heart, I am thankful that my family does not need to go through that, and pray that this will never happen my family. And this reinforces the very good values that we should espouces, that is never to let food goes to waste.

This is a Must Watch Video. This was submitted to a Berlin short film festival “don’t waste food”. It is truly heart breaking. It would be better to watch it with your family members.

In this video, Chicken-a-la-Carte is produced by Fernand Dimadura. I see Happiness and Peace, the laughters and good family values.

Chicken-a-la-Carte
Chicken a-la-carte
Do your part, Don’t Waste, and spread this message around.

Today, as a career person, one tends to spend a lot of time in the office.  So much so, that we don’t even realise that we spend more time in the working environment than our own home.  A typical day of 8.00 am - 6.00 pm takes away 10 hours. And when we are back home, sleep itself takes up at least 7 hours. That leaves 7 hours to be shared about travelling, doing all sorts of unnecessary things to get by. On a normal working weekday, it takes me about 4 to 5 hours to travel to and back from office.  So how much of real time is really left with us for rejuvenating ourselves. Very little.

So it makes sense that one must learn to keep a stress free and happy working relationship in the office, be it with the superior, the peers or the subordinates so that on a daily basis, the majority of the time, we remain at a higher state of life and become happy.

Unfortunately, in our daily intereactions at the office, our mood and behaviour tend to be affected by the relationship with the office colleagues that we intereact with and from my experieonce, one such intereaction that can be unduly stressful, is having to deal with disciplining staff.  Or so they say problematic staff.  To some, this comes easy, to many others, this leads to uneasiness, sleeplessness and unhappiness and in the process brings this emotional setback back to his home and the family becomes the victim.

Handling such staff is an awful stressful matter, which is why many people remained to become a specialist and can only work by themselves free from managing others.

As a superior, how is one going to manage the situation.  My opinion is that even though you may be very senior, but yet when the situation requires it, one may feel stressed up and unable to handle it well.

The cause of this is predominantly due to fear and the lack of self-confidence.  Such situation requires sincerity and truthfulness which requires a frank, open discussion and dialogue.  In my experience, one has to face the issue straight-on, to be brank but yet sincere. The issue is how does one convey the message that needs to be conveyed so thatthe other party feels the same way, that is the need to improve, failing which action is certain.  That is where experience comes in, and if not some pre-preparation needs to be done before getting into it.  At the end, it is whether the staff feels that he has been given the oportunity, to hear, to be heard and also the time to improve.

Such understanding and relationship needs to be build and work upon, instead of being left to changes. The best is to be sincere in engaging a frank dailogue, be sincere and serious.  One must not just believe in it, but to walk the talk and behave as such.

Posted by

Ivan

I went on a trip to London,  just to see how my son settle down who left for London a month earlier to start his 3 years undergraduate study at the London School of Economics. It  dawn on me that things are so expensive overseas , especially if someone from the Asian countries is travelling to Europe, with the Pound Sterling as high as 6.49 just over 3 months ago.    It  was just recently that I had  this discussions with some friends about sending children overseas for education which is very costly.  At today’s rate, sending a kid to complete a course in London would cost almost 75,000 Sterling Pound which when converted to the Asian currencies, is enough for the retirement of many. So the question of whether it is worthwhile  sending one’s kid overseas  is debatable. 

I am surprised that there are many parents out there who I know  are financially capable, but seem unwilling to part with the big sum of money, and eventually settle with some local education.  I am not saying that local education is no good, but given the choice of a good university, I think as parent, we should not let the children down.   There is this wise saying of  “Give a person a fish, you will feed him a day, Teach him how to fish, you  will feed him a life-time”.

I suppose I subscribe to the idea of the later part and this begins my wife and I working on our travel and holiday plan, booking of hotels and air travel,  travel insurance etc.

My trip to London was  to see how my son settle down, so my 8 days travel  was centered  solely around London.

Day 1 – Over a weekend , rented a car from EuropCar and checked in and stayed a Putow Farmhouse, located just about 18 miles east of London, near a small town Dunmow.  Cost is very reasonable at Sterling Pound 55 a night that comes with full English breakfast for a couple. Had dinner at a pub called  “The Black Lion”  within a short distance from farmhouse.

Day 2 – Drove to Cambridge Town which is north-east of London, and spent some time in town, before driving down to London Town to drop the luggage for my son.  Headed of to dinner at a Chinese restaurant in  China Town before heading  back to Putow Farm
 
Day 3 – Drove around Great Dunmow town a short distance from the farmhouse, walk-around shopping, had tea at a  very nice Tea House by the Lake, and then dinner at another pub called Axe and Compass.

Day 4 – 8  Checked  out of farmhouse and checked  into a studio unit at  the Citadines at Tralfagar Square right in City center, just opposite my son’s Residence in Northumberland Avenue for convenience.  Price a bit pricey at Pound 130.

On day 4 -  attended a friend son’s graduation ceremony at the Imperial College, conducted at the Royal Albert Hall   

Spend a lot of time walking around and probably covered 30 Kilometer of walking for the 4 days, visiting places around Trafalgar Square over the next few days. Places visited included    Trafalgar Square , Leciester Square,  Coventry Garden/Open Market , British Museum, LSE Campus Area – around Houghton, Kensington Park/Hyde Park – A long walk across both Hyde Part and Kensington Park, Bayswater Area  - along the streets of Bayswater area.  The Whiteleyse Mall  around the corner is also a good shopping stop. 

Recommended places to have meal includes
- Four Seasons  Restaurant at both  China Town   and  Bayswater
- Cheng Chuan Ku  China Town
- New Fortune Cookie Restaurant next to Queensbay Tube station

Day 9 – Checked into a budget hotel, Premier Inn near London Heathrow Airport  for convenience for next morning boarding flight.  Rate of 55 Sterling Pound , though without breakfast was value for money. Reach home  early morning next day after 13 hours flight, and gone through the usual jet lag for the next couple of days.

My friends have asked that for spending so much money, and just staying put in London which is extremely costly and whether it is worth .   My plan was to visit my son to see that he is well settled down for his next 3 years course.  As a parent, I can only say that it brings me great satisfaction to see the children grow up, and be able to be independent. There is no greater satisfaction than to give them the best which will stay with them wherever they go.  And I am looking forward to at least another trip to visit London, before he completes the 3 year programme.

Posted by
Ivan

The United States had finally made their decision. Senator Barack Obama is now the new president-elect and will become the first African-American President of the United States of America. Euphoria and celebration is seen growing around the world, a sign of world-wide acceptance of the triumph of the 44^th President of the US.. This is truly a crucial and historic moment and serve as a good example to the world. Kenya has declared a public holiday in honour of Obama’s victory.

In his initial victory speech, Obama said “Tonight, because of what we did on this day, in this election, at this defining moment, change has come to America”. In this, people are also expecting a change to this world

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Change is imminent, along with it, the high hopes of the changes that Obama promises during the campaign. We all know that, in all election, not all promises will be carried out in toto, it remains to be seen as how Obama will fulfill the promises.

Come January 20, Obama will be inaugurated as the 44^th US President. Leaders from around the world has expressed confidence of better working ties. Nelson Mandela applauded Obama’s victory and said “Your victory has demonstrated that no person anywhere in the world should not dare to dream of wanting to change the world for a better place”.

It is hoped that his win will give the US and the world a much needed uplift as the global market, led by the US have gone from crisis to crisis and doldrums. Initial sign shows that the stock market in Asia has reacted positively and rebounded to the new of his victory. The Europe market however has not help much with most bourse reported to be down.

In the words of the late Rev Dr Martin Luther King Jr , this has finally seen the realization of his dream for his country to see a man “judged not by the colour of his skin, but by the content of his character:”’

What is significant is symbolic that the US has elected an African-American, the first black as president. This is a good sign and especially to many 3^rd world countries that puts limit and qualifications to who can lead the nation.. People all over – many of them in countries where the idea of a minority being elected as the leader is unthinkable, is now amazed that the US has finally overcome centuries of racial strife and elected one with Hussein as the middle name, to become their president..

Whether we like it or not, the United States is the big brother, and what is does, affect the entire world. Obama will have a humongous task to first tackle the economic condition of the US, and then its foreign policies. People are positive that there will be a better world. The world now expects the Obama presidency to be different. Like he said in Berlin July 2008, his subconscious vision should be better able to see the world for what is is rather than what America wants it to be..

Under Obama, let’s hope to see the US renewing ties with its allies and foes alike, that promises a more peaceful world.

As with any change, everyone is looking forward to a better US and a better world and the whole world appears to share in the joy, in that Obama’s victory raises hopes of a better future for all.. Let’s pray that this will come true.

Posted by

Ivan

Written by : Ivan                                                                  

I choose the topic of sustaining happiness because I think that we are mostly happy at one time or another. The issue is only how does one keep sustaining the level of happiness for a longer duration.  With happiness, there is also sadness, for without sadness what then is happiness.
This an a universal sought after.  Be it someone from the Artic down  to the Antartica,  .  The topic is extremely wide and varied and the writer would like to share his opinion, understanding and offer those few tips and tricks that he encountered  and picked up along this journey.

Happiness
Perhaps at the fundamental level, we must at first try to understand what Happiness stands for and what it means to us.  Our upbringing,  background , environment , educational level  and many other factors shape our outlook towards life and what life stands for.   From this, subconsciously,  we all view Happiness in different light. So at the fundamental level,   one must do some soul-searching and determine for himself what constitute Happiness is to him,  and no one else except him.  The essence is Happiness means different thing to different individual..  This definition can take on lengthy debate, but suffice to say,  it would not do much good to get into an analysis paralysis situation and defeat the purpose of the article.

   
From my own experiences,  I am aware that there may be a spiritual definition of the term Happiness, but for this article, I would rather focus on as it applies to the secular world.
If there is ever a universal gauge on happiness,  and a  measure of  the degree of happiness, we could then see whether there is any difference..To my knowledge, there is non.  For instance can we say that a rich man is more happy than a poor man. This I would say not.

   
Is Happiness a state or a journey.  I am sure we can say that we are all happy at various point in time but the question is that how do we sustain and maintain that level of happiness.
So,  we now need to define Happiness within our own context.. And let us not  confused it  with Success in life. For success in life enompasses the ingredient of happiness,  and  without happiness where then is success. 

 
My tips in my own journey to seek out and sustain my  happiness level  involves the following;
• Keeping a balance/harmonious lifestyle
• Make Necessary Changes & start by changing 

 
 Start with Yourself 
 “When I was yound and free and my imagination had no limits, I dreamed of changing the world. As I grew older, and wiser, I discovered the world would not change, so I shortened my sights somewhat and decided to change only my country.
But it, too seemed immovable.
As I grew into my twilight years, in the one last desperate attempt, I settled for changing only my family, those closest to me, but alas, they would have none of it.
And now as I lie on my deathbed, I suddenly realise, If I had only changed my self first, then by example I would have changed my family.
From their inspiration and encouragement, I would then have been able to better my country and, who knows, I may have even changed the world.”           Anonymous

  
• Take Action/Do not procrastinate
• Communicate & Communicate
• Learn to Say No
• Take your Vacation
• Take and accept responsibility.
• Learn to Forgive and Forget/Letting it go relieves a great burden
• Accept differences and diversity
• Be appreciative of what you have while you strive for more
• Keeping a Healthy Lifestyle.

For some people,  the above may be seen as lethargic,  non-progressive  approach but really, it is sometimes this greed that we harbour that drives us to keeping wanting for more,  and when we do not get it,  we become unhappy.

Just as in  life, happiness is mystical, and as  man seek to understand it more, he will find that they are still unexplained phenomena and more  unknowns uncovered.  As man continue to seek further knowledge on this topic,  let us individual not dwell into all the “if” and “but”, but instead embrace it and maintain a state of mind that we can say we are at a  good level of happiness in Life. 

Yours truly,
Ivan

If you think this can motivate someone